Top hits
You’ve cracked your left ankle 205 times this year! That’s almost half a crack a day!
Your top genres this year were:
Gallbladder pain
General stomach issues
Skin ailment
Sciatica
Period pain
You’ve cursed out the stupid broken body you were born into over 300 times!
Hours spent obsessing over your changing weight: 72
Longest time spent crying about it: 2.5 hours at 1am when you wrote a big post about it!
How’s your mental health?
Down 20% from this time last year
TOP WORRY GENRES: is the cat okay?, I can definitely hear burglars, am I going to catch COVID from this
You’ve dyed your hair 1 time this year, from mid-brown to browner brown using henna. It didn’t really work.
Longest illness this year: that weird thing you had for over a month in February which you’re now thinking might possibly have been early COVID since that woman coughed in your face in Nottingham and that’s where one of the earliest cases was found
Mysterious bruise count: 400
Times you’ve not washed off all your mascara and woken up with murky panda eyes the next day: 49
You’ve only worn a bra 90 times this year, and 30 of those times you didn’t wear it the whole day and only when you had a meeting
What will next year hold?
Your operation on the 11th of January
Getting stronger hair and nails as you can eat more calcium
Having glossier hair as the result of eating more fat
We can’t wait to see you in 2021!
Links:
The Year of Karen | The Guardian
How a meme uncovered the racism white women like to pretend they’re not complicit in.
Every Mr. Darcy, ranked | LitHub
Although to miss out the Lizzie Bennet Diaries is a crime.
Why is publishing so white? | The New York Times
tl;dr can it maybe try not to be this year?
This deserves to be printed in every major newspaper in the world.